As women, it is easy to feel like we have grown up in a world where our main mission in life is to meet the perfect partner, our soul mate. Surely if Disney movies weren’t the cause alone for you to begin your search for prince charming in your younger days, the endless supply of romantic movies and TV shows that tell the tale of women on their search for love will do the trick.
But as we grow and the years go by, what happens when we just can’t find the one? By the time you are a woman in your 30’s, you have passed the ‘lets go to nightclubs and party’ every night stage, you have been a bridesmaid or two, thrown your ’bf’ her baby shower, and a fun night out with the girls (married girls) turns into some kind of sympathetic support group rallying you on your mission to find love.
Let’s be honest, being single can be brutal at times and leave you feeling a little deflated, particularly when leaving yet another family gathering where everyone started a conversation with that same old dreaded question…So are you seeing anyone? Leaving you wondering, is that all I am…just single?
The truth of the matter is that too many people assume that being single is the same as being lonely, and that couldn’t be further from the truth. Can’t a women just enjoy her life and not let being single define her existence? Many fabulous women are embracing the wonderful perks of being single, but if you need a little reminder the next time you start thinking the grass is greener on the marriage train, try to remember these;
1) Get excited about your future, because you don’t know what it holds.
There are few unpredictable surprises we get in life, so just remind yourself; you have got so many wonderful surprises ahead like, how you will meet your partner, what they will look like, your engagement, wedding, babies… Once you have done it, that will be your story, so don’t rush it and enjoy the process.
2) You may not know any different now, but there might be a time when you may not be able to spend your money on certain things for yourself as you may do now.
When you get married, your money also becomes his money and throw kids in the mix… you might be saying…what money? As at today, you might be able to buy yourself those heels, that handbag, maybe that dress you have been eyeing off…so if you can just enjoy it. Those extra years of working and climbing your way to the top might make you more financially stable and independent and that is something to be really proud of!
3) Celebrate your birthday and embrace your maturity.
Too often I hear my single friends dread their pending birthday. This is your life ladies! Once you meet your partner you won’t be able to turn back the clock and enjoy the birthday before, or the one before that. Instead, celebrate your life and realise that perhaps now you are a little older, you are also a little wiser. You will know what you want in a partner, or at least you will certainly know what you don’t want in a partner.
4) Love your single body.
It might sound a little silly, but before you find out what babies might do to that sexy body of yours enjoy it! Being single can often place you in the fortunate place of having more time to spend on yourself, and so take advantage of it. Exercising should not be limited to going to a gym; things like team sports and dancing classes may not only be great for your body but have a great social aspect to it too.
5) Surround yourself with good people.
Good friends are like diamonds too rare to ever trade in. They will listen and comfort you when you want to scream ‘where the hell is he?’ and ‘why can’t I find him’, and they will be your perfect ‘wing women’ when you are out and about on the town. Forgive them when they ask you too many ‘single’ related questions and have some comfort in knowing that chances are their curiosity likely comes after years of married life and wanting to live the single life vicariously through you.
6) One thing that we all can appreciate is time for ourselves.
Life can be so busy, so just a little time out to assess what you want from life, to refocus our thoughts or to simply just be and not think at all, can be so good for the soul. Be thankful for what you have and not what you don’t have, and if you’re truly happy with whom you are within yourself, then your future partner will be very happy with you when he finds you too.